The Sacred Season

My heart feels really sore and fragile today. I’m entering the sacred season of the year for me – I am now within 2 weeks of the anniversary of my sisters’ deaths. December 9, 2007… almost 6 years ago. This year, I am 24 years old, the same age that the shooter was on the … More The Sacred Season

Dear Self

Dear Laurie, Last night, I was not very nice to you. Your soul ached and groaned and begged for relief. I am uncertain sometimes still. I really feel inadequate to give you what you need. I had no idea what you needed last night. You were on the edge of the abyss and I just … More Dear Self

The Promised Land…

“If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through.” I am about halfway through my amends at this very moment. And I’m starting to get it. There’s this tinge of something beautiful stirring whenever I send one of those little notes out. It’s terrifying. Terrifying … More The Promised Land…

my hands are small

It’s not metaphorical. It’s true. I have tiny hands. Size 4.5 ring finger. And they can’t dot things neatly, like that title up there that sits, balancing, without a period to stave off the anxiety of no ending. My hands can’t stop uncertainty. “My world keeps spinning around.” like the lyrics of this song that … More my hands are small